'Signs' from the dearly departed

Home / Columnists / News Columnists / J.D. Mullane
J.D. Mullane
Bucks County Courier Times
October 11, 2005 6:24 AM

One woman said her dead grandmother appears to her in dreams.

Another said she's received messages on her answering machine from her dead son.

A man said he suspects his late son returned to tuck a penny into a penknife for him to find.

As stories of the dead communicating with the living piled up, perky Christine Duminiak's golden coif gleamed angelic as she made her way around Boscov's community room at the Neshaminy Mall last week, moving a cordless microphone from one testimonial to the next.

Duminiak, who has written a book about this stuff, believes these aren't ghostly phenomena but signs of a divine presence.

"People hear these stories and say, 'Wow, that's just a coincidence.' But, in my mind, it's not. These are blessings from God," she said.

In her "after-death communication workshop," Duminiak of Bensalem never challenged a story as being perhaps just a trick of light or sound brought on by grief.

I would have felt better if Duminiak had given confirmed skeptics like me a reason to reconsider that light flickering in the dining room is Dad passing through to say, "Hi." Or the static on the phone is Aunt Rose calling to wish us well from the Great Beyond. I would have been less doubtful if Duminiak had said:

"As most of us learned in high school science, the First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy cannot be created or destroyed, merely transformed. "As you know, we humans are but a bundle of electrical energy. When we die, that energy - our 'soul' - does not vanish, but transforms to a new life force."

She could have cited some scholarly studies rather than anecdotes from her book.

These included a weird eyewitness account that, "We actually have jobs in Heaven," and the even weirder story of how Duminiak's dead in-laws appeared in her bedroom.

Actually, I expected a roomful of oddballs in tinfoil hats, each one-upping the other about inexplicable door slamming, mysterious footsteps in the attic, disembodied moans, "black shadows" and skeletons dancing on the lawn at midnight.

But the room was filled with perfectly average folks, many who had lost a loved one suddenly or tragically and are grieving. That's a tough situation, especially when the death is premature.

With sudden death, there's no time to prepare or to say goodbye.

Survivors are left with nagging remorse that might make them wish for a few minutes more, perhaps to embrace their loved one, perhaps to say something they had always meant to say but never did.

So when pennies suddenly appear on the family room floor, it's attributed to a sign from the departed.

Or if a loved one's favorite singer was Frank Sinatra and "Summer Wind" begins to play on the radio, it's no coincidence.

Or if one is grieving and a car pulls in front with a vanity plate that says "U B HAPY," it's a "sign."

Wishful thinking, if you ask me. But harmless and perhaps helpful.

So I'll cut these folks some slack.

Skeptics could be wrong.

None of us knows what is at the intersection of life, death and the First Law of Thermodynamics. Maybe it is Dad saying hi.

Besides, who hasn't looked into the silence of a clear night sky and wondered:

"Are you out there, somewhere?

And do you miss me? Because I sure miss you."

Jmullane@phillyburbs.com

Mullane's opinion column appears Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday.

http://www.phillyburbs.com/pb-dyn/news/219-10112005-553476.html
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Woman aims to connect with dead at seminar


By JAMES MCGINNIS
The Intelligencer – The Bucks County Courier Times
October 4, 2005 5:00 AM

The late Johnny Carson once wryly observed that, "for three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow ... but the phone calls taper off."

For Christine Duminiak of Bensalem, talking to the dead has become a lifelong calling.

And it's a talent she's just dying to share with you Friday night when she hosts an "After Death Communications" seminar at Boscov's auditorium in Neshaminy Mall in Bensalem.

"The thing that many people need is a sign to know that their loved one is OK," she said. "A lot of people, without that sign, feel that they don't have peace in their hearts."

Duminiak said she would offer free tips on spotting the presence of long-lost loved ones during the 7 p.m. seminar. At least 100 of the living are expected to attend.

And Duminiak is bringing her own crowd for support.

"My father will be patting me on the top of my head. My mother usually will tickle the left side of my face," she said of her dead parents. "They always do that."

Supernatural signs can be as subtle as scents, touches, vivid dreams and waking visions, Duminiak said. Yet, she added be on the lookout for e-mails, calls, coins or even downloaded music.

"Music and pictures can be downloaded on their own," she said. And butterflies, animals, dragonflies, birds and insects may "seem like they know you or belong to you. They can be anywhere from one to 100s in number when they are around you."

Duminiak said she learned to accept the presence of familial spirits in 1998, when the spirits of her husband's parents appeared in her bedroom at 4 a.m.

She said she believes millions of Americans have such "contacts" and that people simply repress most of these experiences.

"The problem is that it is not a mainstream topic. So when the supernatural happens in your life, you don't tell other people because you don't want others to say you're crazy or making it up. I'm trying to make this topic very mainstream," she said.

"Friday we will help each other to validate our experiences. I will be giving some examples from my own life. I will give the audience a chance to share what they have to share," she added. "The message is really simple. We never really have to say goodbye."

To register for the free seminar, call (215) 953-5900.

For more information about Duminiak, visit her Web site at www.geocities.com/adcfriends.

James McGinnis can be reached at (215) 949-3248 or jmcginnis@phillyBurbs.com.

http://www.phillyburbs.com/pb-dyn/news/113-10042005-550176.html

Note: Christine Duminiak’s website has been changed to: www.christineduminiak.com
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Comfort from beyond is not just for the birds


Home / Columnists /Kate Fratti
Bucks County Courier Times
Kate Fratti
October 1, 2004 6:33 AM


I think the red cardinal I sometimes spot in my back yard is my late father. Well, not my father so much as a cheerful sign from him.

I'm not even sure it's the same cardinal I see every time. It's just that when I do spy it from the kitchen window, all I can think is, "Hi, Dad." And I feel happy, like when I run into an old friend I haven't seen in a very long time.

I can't explain it, and if you believe Christine Marie Duminiak of Bensalem, there's no need to.

Christine, author of "God's Gift of Love: After-Death Communications For Those Who Grieve," has talked to hundreds of people like me who are pretty sure their dead loved ones stay close by. She also hears from many others who desperately wish for a sign.

Christine, a hospice volunteer, will talk about the ways deceased friends and family members reach out to cheer us when she leads a workshop from 7-8:30 p.m. tonight in the auditorium of Boscov's department store at the Neshaminy Mall in Bensalem.

She'll outline about 20 common ways, ranging from visions and dreams to scents and touches to messages left on answering machines to WHOA! ... birds.

She'll also share signs from her late dad, like the way he used to tap her lightly on the head while she was cooking dinner, a reminder, she thinks, to call her mom. Or the dimes he still leaves around the house.

Still reading? Bless your open-minded heart.

Christine believes signs from beyond are nothing more than comforting, playful reminders from those who've gone before us to say, "Hey, I'm with you still."

A devout Roman Catholic and a parishioner at St. Ephrem's in Bensalem, Christine says she never planned to write a book or teach a workshop or start a prayer group and message board dedicated to signs from beyond. She was an executive business secretary turned stay-at-home mom who - at 50 years old - was considering heading back to work.

It was about that time, in 1998, that her dead in-laws visited.

Say it ain't so, Chris. Not the in-laws.

Her husband's mom and dad appeared to her in the wee hours one morning and stayed with her - silent, filmy holograms - for more than an hour. In the weeks that followed, they appeared again and again. One time, it was as silhouettes playing pinochle. They never said a word.

Christine started to research after-life communications just to find out what the elder Duminiaks were up to. Out of that research grew a commitment to spread the message that "our loved ones survive death, are still a part of our lives, and that God allows them to communicate with us from heaven."

Researchers estimate 50 million to 100 million Americans have had one such experience or more.

In September 2000, Christine founded Prayer Wave for After-Death Communication - www.geocities.com/adcfriends. It's an Internet grief support, spiritual and prayer Web site where people ask for prayers to receive an afterlife sign, learn how to recognize signs, and share their stories in a loving environment where they don't risk ridicule.

Like the kind I'm going to get when my brother hears dad comes to me as a little bird.

Columnist Kate Fratti, whose opinion column appears on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, will one day visit her survivors as an insatiable craving for carbohydrates.

kfratti@phillyburbs.com